lysoke (
lysoke) wrote in
makinglies2025-09-27 05:54 pm
Entry tags:
Respite
Respite
The lake is dark and calm with a small breeze by the time they arrive at its shores. The stars above reflect perfectly in the still waters before them, and a small copse of trees lines one side, starting on their side of the river and jumping along the other side.
Chris takes a moment to re-prepare the spell he hadn't been able to cast in five years and gestures vaguely to the area around them as a suggestion for what the others can do. Gathering in the forest, sitting on a nearby over-turned log, it didn't matter to him. What he needed was an hour without interruption.
He settles down on the ground and presses his hands together as he closes his eyes to focus on the image in his mind. Within minutes, the white, shimmering outline of a large building forms in thin air. The gentle glow of its light barely spreads from the growing structure.
As promised, it takes the full hour before the slowly filling-in form is complete and finishes with a jaunty, echoing click.
Chris takes a breath, now sitting in front of the stoop that looks annoyingly like the one he'd passed earlier in the night, and gets back onto stiff legs as the glow fades away, leaving smooth, but otherwise unremarkable, white stone behind.
"Here we are. Home for the next however long we need. I'll start working on food and water next." Once they're inside, anyway, which is why he takes back his things from where he'd left them and leads them into the temple, marked only with the carving of ravens on the black wood of the double doors.
Inside is something just shy of opulence. The same polished white stone makes the walls, though black and gold veins course through the marble. The floor is the inverse, a black stone with white, shimmering speckles like a night sky if looked at for long enough. A single window faced East high up on the wall. The temple was alight with sconces at regular intervals along the walls, illuminating an open area that held all the offerings of comfort Chris could think of.
A large hot-springs-like bath, complete with a miniature waterfall, took up the left side of the room and ran into a smaller, similar bath at dog-height. Next to it, covered by a retractable screen, was a shower. Along the back wall, a raven's head emblazoned the white wall in black and watched out over a set of tables, chairs, and a couple of sofas. The majority of the center was clear for walking, but the right edge and right side of the room held a deeply inset pit of pillows, cushions, and blankets in various soft (black and purple) fabrics.
Finally, in the middle of the right-hand wall, there were two closed doors that, when inspected, revealed one room with a large, soft chair and rug, while the other room was made of nothing but stone with jars, pitchers, and plates on shelves along two walls and a cork wall perfect for catching daggers on the other side.
"I hope it works for everyone. I didn't...I didn't make separate bedrooms this time. I didn't figure we would need them tonight."
Chris takes a moment to re-prepare the spell he hadn't been able to cast in five years and gestures vaguely to the area around them as a suggestion for what the others can do. Gathering in the forest, sitting on a nearby over-turned log, it didn't matter to him. What he needed was an hour without interruption.
He settles down on the ground and presses his hands together as he closes his eyes to focus on the image in his mind. Within minutes, the white, shimmering outline of a large building forms in thin air. The gentle glow of its light barely spreads from the growing structure.
As promised, it takes the full hour before the slowly filling-in form is complete and finishes with a jaunty, echoing click.
Chris takes a breath, now sitting in front of the stoop that looks annoyingly like the one he'd passed earlier in the night, and gets back onto stiff legs as the glow fades away, leaving smooth, but otherwise unremarkable, white stone behind.
"Here we are. Home for the next however long we need. I'll start working on food and water next." Once they're inside, anyway, which is why he takes back his things from where he'd left them and leads them into the temple, marked only with the carving of ravens on the black wood of the double doors.
Inside is something just shy of opulence. The same polished white stone makes the walls, though black and gold veins course through the marble. The floor is the inverse, a black stone with white, shimmering speckles like a night sky if looked at for long enough. A single window faced East high up on the wall. The temple was alight with sconces at regular intervals along the walls, illuminating an open area that held all the offerings of comfort Chris could think of.
A large hot-springs-like bath, complete with a miniature waterfall, took up the left side of the room and ran into a smaller, similar bath at dog-height. Next to it, covered by a retractable screen, was a shower. Along the back wall, a raven's head emblazoned the white wall in black and watched out over a set of tables, chairs, and a couple of sofas. The majority of the center was clear for walking, but the right edge and right side of the room held a deeply inset pit of pillows, cushions, and blankets in various soft (black and purple) fabrics.
Finally, in the middle of the right-hand wall, there were two closed doors that, when inspected, revealed one room with a large, soft chair and rug, while the other room was made of nothing but stone with jars, pitchers, and plates on shelves along two walls and a cork wall perfect for catching daggers on the other side.
"I hope it works for everyone. I didn't...I didn't make separate bedrooms this time. I didn't figure we would need them tonight."

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When Wolfe doesn’t move of his own accord, Chris pulls back himself and leans in to press a kiss to his mage’s lips, a brief taste that makes that buried ache pang before he buries it again.
“Go on. You’re better for soft than I am.”
That fetid feeling of resentment after Wolfe had vanished when nearly everyone in creation seemed to be there to help Amelia while Chris’ support were all grieving with only two people to even give voice to how Chris might feel snags at him now. Let them figure themselves out first, he wasn’t alone just yet and he could wait for the rest.
“She needs you for more’n just this and I’ve a ridiculous brat of a man to keep me busy.”
He waves Wolfe toward the shower with no intention of hearing ‘no.’
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"Go on, then. Use your hard edges to soften his," he says with another grin to Jon, one he hopes gets across that he thinks they'll get through this too. They just have to try.
--
After a brief pass by the dogs to let them know they can eat their kills - which apparently they'd already decided was the case and made a bloody mess of the corner near the door that Wolfe used magic to make a less grisly scene - Wolfe approaches the shower. It's just a screen that separates it from the rest of the extremely open concept floorplan, but something in how its places obscures not just sight but also sound. Maybe its magic, he doesn't know, but he's grateful all the same.
Boots come off, then blood-stained shirt, but thats it before Wolfe pads barefoot into the shower area to find Amelia just how he thought he would: a fully clothed and sodden lump on the floor. With a swallowed groan of effort, Wolfe lowers himself down to the floor with her in the heated spray, gently brushing her shoulder until he gets her eyes on him. Without a word and making no effort to hide the splotchy redness crying causes to paint his face, he simply opens his arms, inviting her in against him with a gentle, fragile smile.
Maker take him, seeing her even like this feels the same as coming home. Tears sting his eyes again and he just... let's them. Its alright just to be what they're going to be right now. As long as they're together.
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He starts pulling away when Wolfe does, edging toward the quiet room while the other men have a final discussion. When Chris starts moving for him, though, the edging becomes more of a quick step.
“You should go with him. I told you I’m not undressing when Amelia might walk out of the shower at any moment. You might as well see to her. And yourself. We could all do with a shower before blooding up your hot springs.”
If he just pretends he’s fine, then Chris will tend to the others who need it more. Clearly.
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Luckily, his legs are longer.
He crosses the room, wings unfolding as he goes, so that when he gets to Jon, his Archivist is pinned between door and feather and cleric.
“They’ll be fine. They need each other without me right now. Which means, despite your best efforts, you’re not escaping me.”
He reaches down and cups Jon’s chin with one hand, green eyes intent on studying his boyfriend.
“Why’re you trying to dodge out from letting someone care?”
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And is promptly dislodged by Chris tilting his chin up with a warm hand. It takes an enormous amount of effort not to melt into the touch and give in immediately to whatever it is the cleric wants. But Jon likes to imagine he's made of somewhat sterner stuff than that.
"I'm not the one whose world is falling apart. I knew our being... copies was a possibility. That they might be storing people away to torture and kill in worse ways. I've already had those existential crises." More than once. Maybe a few more times in the future, but he's trying not to think too hard about it. "And there's only so much 'care' to go around. They need it more. You need it more, probably. Your whole plan for being here was just upended. Why are you trying to comfort everyone else?"
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"Knowing it's a possibility and knowing it's true are two different things, love." He knows Jon knows that conceptually, even if he deems it different for himself for whatever reason. "And I have plenty of care for those who're here. I wouldn't be if I didn't."
He wasn't that selfless.
"But as for why...wish I could tell you it's out of goodness or love. Unfortunately, I guess it's just because it's what I can do. I should be cleaning up a war, healing, taking stock, fighting with the others to make them believe you're meant to be there too. I had a hundred different arguments and speeches ready...but there's nowhere to put them. So I can do this."
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"And now we're- I don't know what I'm going to do here, Chris. I'm not good at the things all of you are. I'm from the-" He holds back on saying 'modern world.' "A world more like Duplicity than this one when it comes to technology and comforts. I can't hunt." Not for anything they can eat. "I don't know how to build a fire. I've only just started moving past basics with a dagger. I have 'dietary needs' that are hard to deal with.
"It just feels like I'm going to be more a burden than a help to you now." At least if they'd had the castle and all of that, he could have fallen back on being some sort of scholar, recording everyone's experiences with the dragon, starting an archive for the city. "That's why you should be comforting people who- people who can actually contribute something useful to us as a party." Because that's what they are now. Some bizarre little 'adventuring party,' like a fantasy game.
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"Hold on...I'm gonna assume it's cause we're tired and unsettled and grieving that you just implied that after all of our years together, I'd consider you worth less of my time for the perceived contribution to this party. A perception I'm afraid your education is limited on, clearly. My fault for not being clear from the start."
He leans in a little closer, a brow raising as he does so. "I don't need you to fight or hunt or even charm people, Jon. I need you because I need you. Because I haven't been in a relationship with anyone as long as I've been with you, even Wolfe by a measurable bit. You'll be a help to us because of this." He reaches up to tap Jon's forehead. "You're the smartest of us. You eat information like you're starving and, even if this is my world, there's so much I don't know that I have little doubt you'll learn and internalize in a snap. I need you cause your mind is sharp and you'll likely learn first what we can eat safely and what'll kill us, and you'll see things we won't simply because you come from another world, another perspective. I've no doubt we're all gonna need you as much as you'll need us to make sure nothing takes a bite out of you. So...no more of that, alright?"
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“You- I mean, you don’t know that for sure. I can barely even read or write common. What happens if whatever translation effect we had in the City goes away?” He remembers the time that had gone out in Duplicity, how frightening and confusing it had been. They’d managed to get by, but miming wouldn’t work for every person in Faerûn, and having people think he’s completely illiterate… the shame would break him before anything else they’ve learned.
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"I do know all of that for sure because I know it's all true. I've no reason to lie about myself or my motives, you know I'm not so kindly as to say something just to make you feel better if I didn't believe it. I know, too, that you're smart. You know that you're smart...and now you've gone and proven my latter-most point by reminding me of the damn translation thing. I'll write out something to start on: the alphabet and common phrases, but once we've some money, I'll get us some books to start learning from. If it fails afore that...I've got some magic that can help in the short-term."
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“I’m not- If my powers keep working properly, there is the possibility I’ll be able to read and understand, as well, I suppose. It, uh… it never really came up in the city except the once, but I’m sort of… poly-lingual? I think it’s because the Eye wants me to be able to take Statements from anyone. I was just able to understand another language I’d never learned. More than once.
“But actually learning would be good. Just in case it only works for Earth-based languages?” He’s not sure how adaptable an eldritch fear entity could be on another plane. At least somewhat, given Duplicity. “I can start making a list of all the things we need to make sure are covered, maybe? Language… illnesses. Amelia, Wolfe, and I have never been here. We might catch every sickness and disease under the sun with our immune systems not being adapted to it all…”
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"I think it might be better not to rely on the Eye's translation abilities. It might be fine, but just in case it...I don't know, gets it backwards or associates it with an Earth language that's not quite right, I think you and Wolfe have some learning to do."
The thought about the sickness is sound too, if the three of them don't end up huddled up and sad in a week or so, Chris will be genuinely surprised.
"That list'd be very helpful. That's two now you've put thought to that I haven't. For illness, at least, I know some local plants we can keep an eye out for and I can cure anything too dire. Unfortunately...I'm gonna need to let you all suffer through the basic stuff so you can get stronger, so we'll need those herbs to make it easier for you all. Anything else dire we need to plan for? Orr can it wait until after a bath and dinner?"
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"I'll start on it after. I... are you really going to make me get in there with Amelia right over there? What if she sees me? What if I see her? I doubt she's keen on witnessing me in my birthday suit, even if she might like seeing you and Wolfe in yours. Couldn't you just... prestidigitate anything off of me now? I can wait until she goes to bed, then get in.
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Unfortunately, it's his turn to be caught flat-footed with Jon's suggestion. "Well..."
Chris waves his hand towards his partner...and gets nothing short of a few sparkles. "Ah...yeah, so...I don't usually have Prestidigitation. I think the city fucked that one up because it doesn't know my magic, actually...but I don't have it now, I'm afraid."
He at least looks genuinely apologetic. "I hope you'll still love me even if I can't keep things quite as tidy so easily. As for Amelia, the water's not so clear she'll have a full view: there's herbs and salts in the water for healing and muscle aches. Just turn away and practice friendly eye contact once you're both in. It's not like you haven't spent the last seven years avoiding looking at people when you can."
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Cool fingers touch her shoulder, barely there yet more than enough for Amelia to know who they belong to. She turns her face to look at him, sees those open arms, and what little order she'd managed to find within herself over the past few minutes falls apart again.
Wolfe. Her Wolfe. Their Wolfe. Here on the floor with her under water that's much too hot still for how long she's been in here.
Dreams, she needs this. She needs him.
Within seconds she's tucked against his side, crying again but the sound far more happy than it was when she got in here by herself. Things are complicated and everything is both good and wrong at the same time, but Wolfe is at her side again. For the first time since he was taken from them, she feels home again. It's a feeling she worried she might never have again, but here it is again, in Faerun, in this temple that their cleric conjured for them, in a shower he made for all of them so they could be clean and warm and find their wholeness again.
She's going to give Chris the tightest hug he'll allow when she sees him again, whenever that may be and however clothed they may be. For now, she clings to Wolfe, an arm across his chest protectively and a delirious smile on her face as her tears mix with the water falling over them from high above.
"I'm so happy you're here," she whispers above the sound of the spray. "I'm not myself without you anymore. I... I can't be." She can't. She's tried living for herself and it never works without at least one anchor in her life. Wolfe is one of the major anchors in the same way Chris is, and her heart can't even begin to beat properly without them around. She rests her hand on his cheek, just for the contact. "I love you, and I'm so glad we have you again."
We, because even if he's hers, he's as important to Chris and Jon as he is to her, and she'll never try to take that away from any of them.
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He lifts his head at her touch to his cheek, looking down at her as if memorizing her face again, as he'd done when they'd first fallen in love. That is, in fact, what he's doing. It's only been a month but a month is forever when parted against your will and with little else to do but think and wish and want. Carefully, he brushes some of her hair from where it sticks to her face from the water, letting his thumb trace her cheek.
"I can scarcely believe we're really here. That we actually made it. I-" He interrupts himself with a little chuckle. "Nothing I've ever had a hand in planning has ever gone smoothly. Not that getting separated was part of the plan, but getting here. Being out, and more importantly together is..."
Trailing off, Wolfe tries to come up with what it means to him. To be free of Duplicity and everything its done to them, but also of Thedas. The impossibility of it, that they all found each other, all from disparate worlds that are so oddly similar in some cases, but so different too, and now he gets to keep them. His chosen people who have chosen him in turn and dragged him sometimes kicking and screaming into becoming a better version of himself. He doesn't have to take back up the weight of a world that despises him for his gifts because the long shadow of his father's legacy blows out the sun. Its some other Hawke's problem now, and he has Anders to help him through and to protect. They'll be alright.
His chest squeezes at the thought. Its going to take time to let that part go.
"I don't have words. I feel... Light. And like a missing piece has been slotting back into place," he finally says, giving her a small squeeze.
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Maybe that's what Duplicity really is for those copies it places in the city: a way to force change in those people to see what they do about it when they're put through the worst over and over again. It would explain why they hurt her over and over in the same ways, why they took those she loved most or made her physically helpless. Who is the Shadow Mistress if she's alone and unable to take up arms? Who is she when she must learn to rely on those around her by asking for help when she's at her most vulnerable?
It's too big a thought for now, and the fact that it covers some of Wolfe's words upsets her. Now's not the time for that shit. In truth, she hopes the time for such thoughts never comes.
She clings harder to her partner and buries her nose against his chest. They're together again and they've ended up in the plane they said they wanted to finish their lives in. Things are so much more complicated than that because they were separated, as Wolfe said, but their being together means they have everything they need to choose their path. They have no Guardians - to fight or to help them - but also no kingdom to worry over. They have no people to go to on other planes. They have no reason to do anything but stay. That... it's more powerful than the thousands of other paths they could take.
"I know what you mean. My heart... it's still broken by some of what's happened, but I feel like I can pull myself together again. Like I can breathe where I couldn't before." She shakes her head a little, not moving from where she's pushed herself into his side. "I didn't breathe at all while you were gone. People were there and I let them be, but I-I couldn't--"
It doesn't matter. None of it does. This shouldn't be about you right now.
She inhales slowly, breath shaking, then shifts to look up at Wolfe again. "I tried, but even with Chris and the girls, it wasn't enough. And Chris, he..." Her lips pull into a small frown. "I wish I could have done more for him. I already feel like I took advantage of his care at times." When she asked for his arms to cry in without being able to offer anything in return. When she said and did stupid things and he rightfully snapped at her in return. She should have done better by him, for him. Dreams, he deserves so much better than her.
"I'm sorry, love. I... I wasn't strong enough to help us both."
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There might be a small part of him that wants to stall going back out there so Chris doesn't see the new softness around his middle and tease him. Amelia is hopefully too close to notice... This is really not what he should be thinking about right now.
"Everyone grieves differently. Chris is difficult to get close to in his grief. You have to push on it, but if you're grieving yourself, then he almost always pushes first," Wolfe smiles wryly, playing with a strand of Amelia's hair between his fingers. "Whatever bad feeling may still exist there between you over it, it won't last long. Especially not if you tell him what you just told me. I'm sure he knows you weren't in a place to support the both of you. It's something you and I have both noticed, I think, that it becomes harder to ignore ourselves once we stop. It's a process he's going through too."
With a glance at the edge of the screen, Wolfe let's out a breath in more of a worried noise than a sigh. "He's going to take ownership of all of this for a while, Faerun being his world and all. We'll have to make sure he doesn't run himself to the ground and say it's for our sake. He may not be a selfless man, but for people he loves he'll move mountains."
"Just tell him, Love. He only ever just wants to be treated as an equal." It feels good to give advice again, just to talk, even if his voice is growing a little hoarse. He'd not really spoken to anyone much in the last couple weeks. He's going to keep talking anyway, though. A sore throat is a small price to pay to be heard. "It's very hard not to apologize, though, knowing my absence is at the center of that rift."
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"I will. I promise. I'll talk to him and tell him everything I've been feeling." Soon. Right now, she needs to be with Wolfe, to hold him and touch him in ways she's missed so much. She can tell that something's different about him, but the truth is, she doesn't care at this moment. Whatever it is, it can wait. All of it can wait when their day has been so chaotic and they haven't seen each other in weeks. She shifts against him again so she can press their foreheads together as she looks deep into his eyes.
"But don't apologize, love. He won't tolerate it, nor will I." Gently, she brushes his bangs from his face. He looks so tired. "We're going to need you to rest and recover with us before we begin our journey. And..." Her breaths slow, the smile on her lips fading at this next thought. "Can we wait until morning to hear more about what happened to you? I want to know and to help you through it, but after everything else... I'm not certain I can."
As with Chris after Wolfe was taken, she can only take and give so much to her partners at once. Given she's still in her clothes in the shower, it should be obvious she doesn't have much left in her. Today's been one of the hardest and best days of her life all at once.
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For everything to remain stopped for a little bit so they can decide how they're going to wrestle with the idea that they're not exactly who they thought they were.
"As for speaking to what happened, I... I would like very much not to, but it depends on Jon and Chris as well. If they need to know now I don't want to deny them. Its going to hurt just as much now as tomorrow." He sighs, his gaze dropping from examining each strand of color that makes up her irises to the top curve of her cheeks, but not really seeing much more than a blur of color for the proximity. "I don't know which is better."
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Fuck she is so tired after everything that happened while they were separated and the rush of battle leading to such a crash when they learned the truth of what they are. Why couldn't they have had just a few days, hours of peace before the very essence of who they thought they were was ripped from them? Couldn't the gods of this plane or whatever the fuck controlled that dreamsforsaken city they escaped from give them that?
Why must it all be so hard when they're finally free?
Nothing worth having comes easy. She knows that. She can handle that. Any day but today she could handle that. But not today, not--
She exhales slowly, pressing her forehead a little more insistently to his. Grounding. Being close to Wolfe is grounding. Wolfe is safe. No matter what they are, no matter what's happened to them or what's coming, she knows him. So long as they have each other, they'll find their way through.
They have to.
"I'm here for you, no matter what comes." She forces her eyes open and to give them both space enough to see one another. "We'll ask the others their thoughts when we get out of here, and make the choice about when to talk about all of this then. After we're settled and clean--" Clean. Fuck. She groans and drops her forehead to his cheek.
"I left my soap on the table. I guess we aren't getting very clean in here." So much for her plans of using a little soap on her clothes to clean out the blood and to make herself smell more like 'normal'. Dreams, she's a fucking mess right now.
Hopefully he'll still love that about her.
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Too tired to cast without motion to guide his spell, Wolfe gestures with the hand not currently supporting Amelia and uses his magic to coax what he thinks is probably soap from the table. That's the wrapper of the place she liked around the corner from Venia, hes reasonably sure. Unfortunately, even though he is right that it is soap, his aim with his magic is entirely off. The bar flings itself off the table in the general direction of the shower but instead of landing and skidding to Wolfe's hand like he intended it bounces off of Chris' shoulder and lands on the marble floor with a sad smack.
"Balls. Sorry!"
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With his cloak already peeled off and set aside, there's not much else he's worried about getting wet besides maybe his boots, but it shouldn't be a problem...not when he scoops up the soap and leans around the screen to look at the still-clothed set on the floor.
"What were you gonna do, soap up over your clothing? You know I can't magically dry all that anymore, right?"
He unceremoniously drops the soap onto the two of them with the expectation someone would catch it. Even if a petty part of him hoped they wouldn't.
"Are you gonna be a while? Jon's worried about Amelia feeling weird being naked near him...since I think he does in the reverse. I was meant to be keeping watch." He doesn't roll his eyes, but his voice does for him.
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No, she will not be apologizing for the soap smacking you, cleric. She will silently wish it would've smacked you on the ass, though.
At the mention of Jon being so modest, she rolls her eyes again. "If he needs more time without me around, we can stay in here longer. I don't care one way or another about his state of undress, nor about mine in front of him. I was well used to being around people at various levels of nakedness from my time at the House long before Duplicity."
Don't think about how those aren't your memories. Not now. Not now. Not yet. No.
She sighs dramatically to cover the slight shake to her breath, then smiles softly at Chris as she sits up. "If he wants to be fully alone, we'd welcome you to join us. I have plenty of soap, and I haven't managed to use all the hot water yet."
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"I think he's the only one with an undressing problem because I know you don't have an issue being naked," Wolfe declares as he gestures to Chris to come join them. With the gesture comes a tug from the front and a push from behind. Not hard, not enough that he'll fall or even stumble, but definitely enough to get the point across that his presence is not just being invited but requested specifically. "We'll rinse together and then switch over, but come here and let me kiss you, damnit."
Even so eager to have Chris near again, Wolfe doesn't let go of Amelia. He's going to allow himself this selfish act of hoarding when he's missed them both so desperately. Just for a few moments.
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cw: mention of nonconsensual sex under the influence of drugs
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cw: PTSD, body horror, death, mild gore
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cw: link leads to an extremely dub-con situation; mild self-harm
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cw: light panic, ptsd
cw: light panic, ptsd
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dirty 20 insight
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cw: minor ptsd moment, paranoia
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